DrTed home page


My son Jon is a song writer and singer as well*. When he graduated from Middlebury College in 1993 I asked him to write a song about getting braces. He wrote the "Ballad of Dr. Ted,"  for which I paid him $100.  I've  played it many times in the office for patients who come in for consultation. It tells the classic and joyous story of a young boy who learns that he needs to  have braces. Of course he does the classic thing, he asks the advice of his friends...      who wouldn't?  He ends up following the advice of his best friend "Jason" who changes his life forever by advising him to go to "Dr. Ted because "Nobody does it better." 

* My favorite song of his is called The Only Thing (click to hear the song),  which he wrote and dedicated to Amy  the girl he married on October 26, 2003.   It tells of the pain that comes with loving one another. (Click to read the lyrics)


                                                  Ballad of Dr Ted  (YouTube)

March 21, 2009     I have always believed that the American Association of Orthodontists lacked a musical composition that represented this important organization.
                            Ever since my son and his music writing partner composed the BALLAD OF DR TED I have resolutely held the firm conviction that it
                            represents the quintessential experience of getting braces. When I expressed my beliefs to the President of NESO (Northeast Society of
                            Orthodontists) he agreed to present it to the delegation that reviews such proposals on my behalf. Consequently, on March 21, 2009 
                            in Boston, the President proposed that our organization select a musical composition and placed in nomination for such a piece of music
                            the THE BALLAD OF DR TED
as it appears on YouTube.

I was turning 12 years old when my parents broke the news-
What a scare!
They said, "We don't want to upset you and we know you might refuse
...and that's fair,
But you're teeth are really crooked and you have an overbite-
You've got a lovely smile and we wanna' make it right:
We'll leave it up to you, we know that you are bright...
Don't despair!"

So, I called up all my friends and asked them what they'd do,
If they were me?
Well, Suzie said, "Forget it, " and Tommy said, "No way,
Even if it's free,"
But Jason, who had braces, said, "Hey, it's not so bad.
When your teeth are nice and straight, I am sure you will be glad...

[[[And I have an orthodontist, who makes it really fun.
Hey, I think you'll really like him, I play baseball with his son.
His name Dr. Ted, and I know that he's the one,
To fix your smile right-you'll be happy when you're done, and...
Hear only this section of the Ballad of Dr. Ted..748KB  by Jon Rothstein and Robbie Schiffman
I'm a fan of Dr. Ted!
I'm a fan of Dr. Ted!
He's the man, Dr. Ted,
And nobody does it better!"]]]

Well, I went down to his office with my parents by my side
that Saturday.
We met with Dr. Ted, and he looked inside my mouth
And then began to say,
"Your teeth are pretty crooked, and I see an overbite--
If you care about your smile, I'll help you make it right...

I can get them all together-Don't worry, have no fear.
You'll be finished up so quickly, you'll forget that you were here!
Don't worry how it looks, I've got brackets that are clear,
And ones that go behind the teeth"--Yes! Yes!...
I nearly cheered.

[[[I finished up in 19 months, the way that I'd been told
when I began.
Of course I kept my appointments and broke the fewest possible brackets
A twelve year-old can.
And my teeth, they weren't crooked and I had no overbite.
At last, I saw my smile, MY SMILE WAS WIDE AND BRIGHT.
Hear only this section of Ballad of Dr. Ted Part II.wav ...4.5Mb
Now, I'm 24, and I still marvel at the sight.
Jason, if you're out there, thank you, you were right...now...

I'm a fan of Dr. Ted!]]]
That same man, Dr. Ted, yeah
I'm a fan of Dr. Ted
And Nobody does it better,yeah

Nobody does it better, no...No, nobody, does it...better.

THE BALLAD OF DR. TED: Master Smilemaker  (solely as vocal)        Click here to see the sheet music including guitar chords: pdf format

* From the CD "Knee Deep in Giants" by the Hillary Step,  solo vocal Jon Rothstein